Archive for the Uncategorized Category

A new chapter in the transpontine struggle

Posted in Uncategorized on January 11, 2013 by Wolfgang Moneypenny

Comrades, how long has it been that you have suckled from my mutated teat?

And how lost were you when I disappeared to Brazil in hot pursuit of my AWOL accountant as my mayoral candidacy collapsed into financial controversy?

It is therefore with a heavy heart that I must leave you. As some of you will already know, I have launched a new initiative to solve the housing crisis, Moneypenny Homes. It will, I am sure, prove of far greater benefit to my constituents than idly lazing around the commune, dreaming of bombing the Millennium Dome. Just check out this VT:

Real change in a really changing world. As I have always said, dear comrades, “Achtung! The future!”

Yours succulently,

Wolfie x

Removed because I’m an idiot…

Posted in Uncategorized on March 26, 2012 by Wolfgang Moneypenny

…a complete & utter idiot.

Front page of The Sun today

Posted in Uncategorized on March 20, 2012 by Wolfgang Moneypenny

The NHS has saved my balls. Literally. Twice in my life my right testicle has migrated dangerously north (like an unsatisfied transpontine). There was also the medically necessary circumcision aged around 6 years old*. And then the two – again, apparently medically necessary, even urgent – operations to widen my (for want of a less racist word) jap’s eye (can you imagine calling circumcision a “Jew de-hooding”?!).

* = The whole operations thing is horrible, especially as a kid. But the worst thing about my trip to St. George’s in Tooting for that particular snip was franchise-clown Ronald McDonald getting in the same lift as me and trying to entertain the scared-shitless kid. Fuck off, Ronald. I was terrified. And take your obvious metaphor for health service privatisation away with you. Twat.

A letter in the South London Press

Posted in Uncategorized on December 23, 2011 by Wolfgang Moneypenny

image

The Best Webpage in All Transpontinia

Posted in Uncategorized on July 4, 2011 by Wolfgang Moneypenny

Here it is.

The Elephant & Castle Subway Gallery: Long Lost Opening Night

Posted in Uncategorized on June 29, 2011 by Wolfgang Moneypenny

Tonight at 7 o’clock, meeting under the famous Elephant & Castle Shopping Centre statue:

Come marvel at the too long ignored mosaic artworks under the world’s most mad, bad & dangerous roundabout. A night of conversation, networking and (if you’re sneaky) fine wine awaits as you mingle with bemused commuters and the dispossessed.

We will be joined by retroactive curator and head cheese’n’pineapple-on-a-cocktail-stick waiter the Rt. DisHon. Wolfgang Moneypenny, revolutionary transpontine hero of the oppressed peoples of South London.

Hope to see you there darlings! Or else.

Bloody Sunday, The Saville Enquiry & The/the Troubles

Posted in Belfast, British Empire, Change We Can Believe In, FreeSouthLondon, Protest, Radio Free South London, South London, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on June 16, 2010 by Wolfgang Moneypenny

In my Radio Free South London interview with Mr. Reggie Chamberlain-King of West Belfast, he eloquently explained that the continued existance of The Troubles in Northern Ireland, even just in terms as a topic of interest & conversation, of tourist & academic whim, is essentially a continuation of The Troubles.

I expect therefore that he may well be cautios of the publication of the Saville Enquiry‘s report into the Bloody Sunday shootings of 1972, given as it will – and is – sparking off more talk & interest in The Troubles, and according to this Chamberlain-King thesis, continuing the divisions of The* Troubles.

I would like to play Devil’s advocate (for Mr. Reggie Chamberlain-King has indeed played the Devil), Do the benefits if any of this enquiry, be it the quest for truth, justice or retribution, amount to enough of a Pro to counterbalance the Con of this continuation?

In a world of African civil slaughters, Chinese mining fuckgasms, countless alcohol-related deaths and highspeed hit & runs, 12 years enquiry to an incident that occured nearly 40 years ago seems, whilst not unjust, certainly unusual. It is quite clear the enquiry is about the symbolic value of Bloody Sunday more than any value of of human life. And it is, I think, the symbolic life of The Troubles that is the continuation.**

A space will now be left for Reggie to respond, should he at all disagree with me, or alternatively to congratulate me:

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* = I even fear my capitalization of “The” is part of this very process.

** = Which includes this. Fuckchops.